The missing are harder to accept than the lost. My parents had been dead five years, but my sister? Sheâd been missing only three months. Iâd grieved those whoâd died, but I didnât know how to feel about Tali. Guilt, fear, anger, hope â they came and left as fast as water birds taking flight.
She was out there, somewhere. A prisoner of the Dukeâs, stolen from me just as heâd stolen the city of Geveg, the pynvium from our mines, the food from our tables. His greed had turned to war, and heâd crushed all of us under his boot, racing to get even more power. No one was safe, certainly not Tali.
Late at night, safe at Jeatarâs farm, I wondered if it was time to stop looking for her. I hated myself for thinking it, but it wasnât just my life I was risking by trying to find her. My friends put themselves in danger every time we left the farm, and some had even got hurt because of me.
But then my guilt would haunt me. How could I stop looking? Iâd made so many promises. Others had sacrificed so much to help me. It wasnât just about one lost sister any more, but thousands of families ruined by the Duke of Baseer and his desire to control everyone in the Three Territories.
If I gave up on Tali, was I also giving up on them? On any chance we had to be free of him? To just be free?
Someone knocked on the door to the room I shared with Aylin. I didnât want to answer. Iâd tossed and turned all night, worrying and planning, and was really hoping to grab a few hours of sleep this morning now that Aylin wasnât hogging the bed.
âNya?â Danello said through the door. âAre you awake?â
Yes, but I didnât want to be. Weâd argued again last night. One of those dumb fights that started over nothing and ended with both of us storming off. If I opened the door heâd smile at me, and then Iâd want to forgive him, and I wasnât ready to forgive him.
Trouble was, I couldnât remember exactly why weâd argued. But it had been his fault. I was almost sure of that.
âNya, come on.â Danello knocked again. âYou canât still be mad at me.â
It had been over scouting reports, hadnât it? Troop movements outside Baseer. Iâd said that gave us an opening to sneak into the city, but Danello said it could be the army moving around again to make way for more soldiers. I said I wanted to leave by the end of the week â he thought we should wait until we had more information. I said something stupid and he said something stupid back.
âI have food,â he sang.
My mutinous stomach grumbled and I sighed. That was cheating, plain and simple.
âI have good food.â His sweet voice was light and playful. Hard to stay mad at him when he sounded like that. I pictured him out there, leaning on the door, his hair a mess from the breeze coming off the fields.
OK, maybe it wasnât completely his fault. Aylin said Iâd been grumpy lately â probably from lack of sleep. It wasnât like he was telling me I couldnât go, just that I should be extra careful, think things through first. Without knowing why the Duke was moving those troops around, caution wasnât a bad idea.
And Danello had brought food.
I slipped out of bed, walked across carpet thick as my thumb, and opened the door. Danello carried no plate in his hands, but he did have a picnic basket.
I sensed a trap.
âI packed this full.â He held up the basket. Handmade from the looks of it, blue-reed weaves, too. Those didnât come cheap. âAll you have to do is come with me to get it.â
I hesitated. He wasnât out of the woods yet, but if he had sweetcakes in that basket, I could manage a little forgiveness.
âWhere?â
âJust to the gardens. Sunshine, fresh air.â He grinned, wide and silly. âItâll be fun, and we could use a little fun.â
Aylin had been telling me the same thing. I grinned back. It had been a dumb fight anyway. âLet me get dressed.â
I shut the door and threw on some clothes, then ran a comb through my still-black curls. The dye Aylin had used to colour our hair and disguise us was starting to grow out, but unless I cut it as short as Danelloâs, it would be months before I looked normal again.
Have you ever been normal?
I pushed the thought away as I opened the door. Danello beamed, his short blonde hair ruffled just like I pictured, his smile just as sweet. He offered me his arm and I took it.
âDid you pack sweetcakes?â I asked.
âYouâll have to come with me to find out.â
I followed, actually looking forward to something for a change.