HarperTrueLife
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First published by HarperTrueLife 2015
FIRST EDITION
Text © Sue Askins 2015
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Ebook Edition © February 2015 ISBN: 9780008100155
Version 2015-01-30
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July 2001. Julian is taking the boys â Josh, 11; Harvey, 8 â to see Tomb Raider at the cinema.
âSorry,â I mumble. âIâm not really interested in that.â
Amazingly, off they go, a boysâ outing (theyâll be picking up some tips for the PlayStation game, no doubt), leaving me at home alone for two whole hours, maybe even stretching to three if they stop for a burger on the way home. In which case, I mightâve written a whole page.
Iâve decided to try to tell a story â my story, our story. I donât feel like a proper author. Itâs a therapy, a hobby perhaps. Iâm a bit nervous now. Shy. What do I type first? I trust you will bear with me as I tell a simplified version of the last few years; I am just a mum, not a professional writing a thesis.
Perhaps itâs time for a tea break. No, letâs crack on. But where do I start? Maybe by telling you who I am.
I am 39.
A hassled mum.
Red haired (with a touch of grey).
Family orientated.
Forthright.
Sparrow legs.
Loyal.
The opposite of lazy.
Retired.
Kind (hopefully).
Artistic.
To help me remember, Iâve found my old diaries. They mention Josh a lot, not surprisingly, as he was my first baby. Itâs interesting to reread some of the entries 20 years later, seeing possible underlying messages.
But Iâll go back even further to a âpre-childrenâ era, when autism was just a word Iâd heard from Rain Man, and MS was something that happened to other people. I can deal with all those issues later.
Iâll see what evolves on the computer screen. In fact, I think I hear a car. Yes, theyâre back. Iâve wasted those precious hours on waffling, two cups of tea, three trips to the loo, a quick nap. I can see this is going to be a long process.
I retired at 35 after being diagnosed with multiple sclerosis. I can hear you groan at this point. Who wants to read a story of doom and gloom? Itâs not a morose tale, though, so please donât be put off! I donât feel sorry for myself. So as long as you understand that I wouldnât usually bang on about my problems then I can begin without any worries.
Without MS, I doubt I wouldâve had time to sit and write. I donât feel itâs an important issue to talk about normally â after all, thousands of people have MS; and many have nastier conditions to live with â but I canât deny its presence in my life.
It is a strange disease, which can appear and then disappear for many years. I was lucky, even though I suffered silently for a very long time. I didnât know what was wrong with me, which left me free to carry on with my life, get married, have children and live normally in total ignorance, and Iâm grateful. Whether Julian thinks along the same lines, I donât know â only he could answer that â but Iâd like to think it wouldâve made no difference to our lives together. Who can say what they would or wouldnât do, if we had the future mapped out beforehand?