Shall I tell you what I got for Christmas? A pair of shoes with heels. Coo-el. At first my mum said I wasnât old enough for heels.
âIâm ten,â I told her. âHow old do you have to be?â
Dad said, âYouâre tall enough already.â But heâs just worried that one day Iâm going to be taller than him.
I really, really wanted them, you know what I mean? So I just kept on and on and in the end⦠I won! One-nil to me. Yeah!
Theyâve got silver buckles on them. They are drop-dead gorgeous. I told Mum and Dad, âYouâre the best, most groovy parents in the whole wide world.â So it was really important to come up with something brill for them.
My dad was easy, I always buy him a big bar of Toblerone. Itâs his fave chocolate. Then I found the perfect present for Mum: this fat little pig lying down in the mud with all her babies round her. It was so cute. My mum adores pigs, sheâs got a whole collection. The only trouble was it cost four pounds fifty!
Iâm always broke, are you? Kenny is too, money goes through her fingers like water. So we came up with this brilliant idea to earn some, and we got the rest of the Sleepover Club to help us. It was a great plan and we could have been seriously rich, if Kennyâs horrible sister, Molly The Monster, hadnât spoiled everything. But donât worry, we got our own back. When we had our last sleepover at Kennyâs house we gave her a real scare. It was excellent.
I know, I know, we got grounded again, but listen, it was worth it. She nearly went haywire. And I had the best part in it.
Come on. Letâs go up to my room and Iâll tell you all about it. But remember, this is Sleepover Club business, so donât tell the others I told you.
Can you remember everyone? Laura McKenzie, otherwise known as Kenny. Fliss â her real name â Felicity Sidebotham. Lyndsey Collins â we call her Lyndz, weâve been friends scince we first started school. And Rosie Cartwright. And me, of course: Francesca Theresa Thomas, but everyone calls me Frankie.
Now where should I start?
I suppose it really started early in December, the day we were helping our teacher, Mrs Weaver, put up the Christmas decorations in the hall. It was a great skive, it took all afternoon. She kept having to go out to check on the rest of the class so we spent most of the time wrapping ourselves up in paper chains and Chinese lanterns. It was such a laugh. Then we started talking about Christmas presents and what we were going to buy each other. After that I didnât feel like laughing.
âIâve got all your presents and theyâre already wrapped,â said Fliss.
I couldnât believe it.
âWhatâve you got us?â said Kenny, straight out, just like that.
âThe new Oasis tape.â Fliss looked so pleased with herself.
âWhat, all of us?â said Rosie. âWowsers!â
The others were dead excited but at first all I could think was: itâs just not fair. Fliss has so much more money than the rest of us. She gets loads of pocket money. Even Lyndz can earn extra by helping her mum with Spike, their baby, but Rosie and Kenny and me just get regular pocket money and itâs never enough, especially at Christmas. Fliss had spent nearly as much money on each of us as I had to spend on everyone put together.
When I went home I tried to talk to my mum and dad about it but it was a waste of time. My mum and dad are lawyers; they have an answer for everything.
âPlease, can I have some extra money? I really need it. Fliss has spent pounds on my Christmas present.â
âHow do you know that?â said Dad. âDid she leave the price on?â
âOf course not. But everyone knows what tapes cost.â
âWell, perhaps Felicity can afford to spend that much on her friends, but itâs no reason why you need to,â said Mum.
âRemember itâs Christmas,â said Dad. âItâs not a competition.â
Well, I knew that. My grandmaâs always telling me, itâs not the gift that counts, itâs the thought behind it. But it wasnât just Flissâs present I was worried about. I needed money for everyoneâs. I went upstairs and emptied my purse and counted my money. But Iâd only counted it half an hour earlier and it still only came to £8.43. If I spent £4.50 on my mumâs pig Iâd have less than £4 to spend on everyone else put together. I wrote a list of the people I wanted to give presents to: Mum & Dad, Grandma, Grandad, Kenny, Fliss, Lyndz, Rosie and some chews for Pepsi, my dog. It just wasnât enough and you didnât have to be Mastermind to work that out.
I needed a good moan, so I got on the phone to Kenny. Sheâs my best friend after all and thatâs what best friends are for.
âHiya. Itâs me, Frankie.â
âOh, hi, Frankie.â
âI am so broke. Iâve only got £8.43 in all the world.â
âWell, thatâs more than Iâve got.â