First published in Great Britain by Faber and Faber Ltd. in 1977
First published by HarperCollins Childrenâs Books in 2017
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Copyright © The Estate of Helen Creswell 1977
Cover design © HarperCollinsPublishers 2017
Cover illustration © Sara Ogilvie 2017
Helen Cresswell asserts the moral right to be identified as the author of this work
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Source ISBN: 9780008211677
Ebook Edition © 2016 ISBN: 9780008211684
Version: 2016-12-20
When Rosie, who was only eight anyway, beat him doing ten lengths of the pool, it was the last straw. He didnât show he cared. He made such a point of sauntering carelessly to the dressing room that he skidded and went flat and everybody laughed. He forced himself to laugh as well, and only found the grazes on his elbows when he was towelling himself.
I got born in the wrong family, he thought, as he trudged back home alone over the fields. The others were still in the water, getting their moneyâs worth.
Ordinary Jack, thatâs me. Itâs what they shouldâve christened me â Ordinary Jack Matthew Bagthorpe â with an e.
There were four Bagthorpe children, and the other three were always winning prizes and medals, and William, the eldest, had got to the point where he was winning cups, silver ones, for the sideboard, and little shields with his name engraved on them.
Youâre immortal if your name gets put on cups and shields, thought Jack moodily. Iâll never be immortal.
Williamâs cups and shields were for tennis, and were bad enough in themselves, but what really rankled was that tennis was only the second String to Williamâs Bow. (Most of the family had second Strings to their Bows, and some had three or even four. Strings to Bows were thick on the ground in the Bagthorpe household.) Williamâs real speciality was electronics. He had put up an aerial thirty feet high in the vegetable garden and was in touch with a whole lot of radio hams all over the world including one called Anonymous, from Grimsby, who wouldnât give his real name. William said he was a pirate, which sounded fascinating, but he wouldnât let anyone else speak to him.
âA veil of secrecy must be preserved,â he was fond of saying.
Jack, who would have given anything to be on speaking terms with a pirate from Grimsby, often felt like punching William when he said this.
Uncle Parker was dozing in a deckchair under the apple trees when Jack reached home.
âHello, young Jack,â he said, without opening his eyes.
Thereâs another of them, Jack thought. Can even see with his eyes shut.
None the less, he liked Uncle Parker, who was not all that brilliant, and whose main distinction was that the way he drove his car was the talk of the neighbourhood (though he had never yet been prosecuted for it).
âIf you could do anything in the world this afternoon, what would you do?â enquired Uncle Parker, his eyes still closed. This was another thing about him that Jack liked. He never said what you expected him to say.
âBe immortal,â said Jack promptly.
âBit pointless,â observed Uncle Parker. âYouâre bound to survive the afternoon anyway, I should say. You canât be immortal just for an afternoon, you know, old son.â
âI know that,â said Jack, nettled. âIt means to live for ever. Anyway, you asked me, and I told you.â
âYou wonât get immortal piggling at your fatherâs pansies,â said Uncle Parker. âThat I can tell you. More likely to get cut off in your prime.â
Jack snatched away his hand which had admittedly, though quite of its own accord, been picking off pansy heads.
âIt just shows what a nervous wreck I am,â he said. âI already bite my nails, and say âtouch woodâ all the time, and now Iâm piggling pansies. Goodness knows how Iâll end up.â
âI suppose what youâre all steamed up about as usual is not being a genius?â
Jack nodded. The two of them had had this kind of conversation before. Uncle Parker, not being a Blood Relation of the Bagthorpes, merely lucky enough to be married to Jackâs Aunt Celia (who was not only ravishingly beautiful but could also solve