This novel is entirely a work of fiction. The names, characters and incidents portrayed in it are the work of the authorâs imagination. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or localities is entirely coincidental.
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First published in Great Britain by Collins, The Crime Club 1930
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Source ISBN: 9780008196516
Ebook Edition © DECEMBER 2016 ISBN: 9780007422494
Version: 2017-06-09
It is difficult to know quite where to begin this story, but I have fixed my choice on a certain Wednesday at luncheon at the Vicarage. The conversation, though in the main irrelevant to the matter in hand, yet contained one or two suggestive incidents which influenced later developments.
I had just finished carving some boiled beef (remarkably tough by the way) and on resuming my seat I remarked, in a spirit most unbecoming to my cloth, that anyone who murdered Colonel Protheroe would be doing the world at large a service.
My young nephew, Dennis, said instantly:
âThatâll be remembered against you when the old boy is found bathed in blood. Mary will give evidence, wonât you, Mary? And describe how you brandished the carving knife in a vindictive manner.â
Mary, who is in service at the Vicarage as a stepping-stone to better things and higher wages, merely said in a loud, businesslike voice, âGreensâ, and thrust a cracked dish at him in a truculent manner.
My wife said in a sympathetic voice: âHas he been very trying?â
I did not reply at once, for Mary, setting the greens on the table with a bang, proceeded to thrust a dish of singularly moist and unpleasant dumplings under my nose. I said, âNo, thank you,â and she deposited the dish with a clatter on the table and left the room.
âIt is a pity that I am such a shocking housekeeper,â said my wife, with a tinge of genuine regret in her voice.
I was inclined to agree with her. My wifeâs name is Griseldaâa highly suitable name for a parsonâs wife. But there the suitability ends. She is not in the least meek.
I have always been of the opinion that a clergyman should be unmarried. Why I should have urged Griselda to marry me at the end of twenty-four hoursâ acquaintance is a mystery to me. Marriage, I have always held, is a serious affair, to be entered into only after long deliberation and forethought, and suitability of tastes and inclinations is the most important consideration.
Griselda is nearly twenty years younger than myself. She is most distractingly pretty and quite incapable of taking anything seriously. She is incompetent in every way, and extremely trying to live with. She treats the parish as a kind of huge joke arranged for her amusement. I have endeavoured to form her mind and failed. I am more than ever convinced that celibacy is desirable for the clergy. I have frequently hinted as much to Griselda, but she has only laughed.