We’re British, Innit: An Irreverent A to Z of All Things British
Unlike the Government's Citizenship Test, this is the real measure of Britishness.Written in a snappy A-Z format with quiz questions throughout to test your Britishness, Iain Aitch explores all things British in a funny, evocative way. Whether it's fish and chips, James Bond, red telephone boxes or white dog poo, everything you've ever regarded as being uniquely British is within these pages and guaranteed to bring a smile of recognition to even the stiffest of upper lips.Test your knowledge of Britain and what it means to be British by answering a multiple choice question for each entry and then read on to discover the ‘correct’ answer.With more style than Jarvis Cocker's moves and more pomp than Elgar's masterpiece, Iain Aitch celebrates all that is truly glorious about good old Blighty. A book for the entire British population - Northerner, Southerner, and even tourist and immigrant alike - this is the perfect read for someone looking for the truly British experience.Aitch gives us the real Britain, not one filtered through the eyes of civil servants or politicians. This is the dictionary of the Britain that you affectionately know and love. From asbos to garden gnomes, Tennent's Super to tube maps, to socks and sandals and spam and Smash potato, this is the most definitive list yet created that encapsulates the sights, sounds and even smells that make Britain what it is today.
Читать We’re British, Innit: An Irreverent A to Z of All Things British онлайн беплатно
WE’RE BRITISH, Innit
AN IRREVERENT A-Z OF
ALL THINGS BRITISH
IAIN AITCH
Contents
Introduction
Alcopops
Badgers
Caravanning
Daffodils
Eastenders
Faggots
Garden fences
Hackney carriage
Iceland
Jerusalem
Kagouls
Languages
Magna Carta
National Anthem
Oak trees
Page 3
Queen Elizabeth I
Radio 4
St Andrew
Tabloids
Umbrellas
VAT
Wanker
Xenophobia
Yard of ale
Zero tolerance
How British Are You?
Acknowledgements
About the Publisher
Whether we see ourselves in the misty mornings of George Orwell’s describing, Bill Bryson’s fondly mocking words, the photographs of Martin Parr or the characters of LittleBritain, we Brits are always looking to work out who we are and to maintain our idea of what it is to be British. As an island race, this identity is of paramount importance to us, and one that we have literally fought to maintain over the years. Yet, ask any group of Britons what the ideas, characteristics or items that define the nation are and you will get myriad different answers. It could be fish and chips, a sense of fair play or simply the ability to form an orderly queue at the drop of a hat. Though those questioned are just as likely to pick up on our love of tea, our complete disdain for the metric system or our ability to rattle on endlessly about the weather. Whatever Britain is, it does not stay the same for long. We know what we like and we love our traditions, but we are also endlessly adaptable and willing to give things a go. How else do you explain the success of the chicken tikka massala or dado rails?
This A-Z of Britishness is an attempt to finally pin down what it is that makes us British in the twenty-first century, as well as allowing you to measure your character, loves and dislikes against what I feel is the most definitive list yet created. Think of it as a kind of Citizenship Test for those who already hold a passport or as an alternative learning guide for those who wish to get their hands on one. This is the real Britain, not one filtered through the eyes of civil servants and politicians. This is the dictionary of the Britain that you know and love, whether you ever whisper those three little words to it or not. This is not the sterile Britain shown in the photographs of a pamphlet issued by Her Majesty’s Stationery Office, rather this is the Britain that finds Barbara Windsor as inspiring as Winston Churchill, the Britain that is still mildly suspicious of the ‘continental’ quilt. It is the Britain that wept for Princess Diana yet thinks her brother is a bit smug, the Britain that knows that pub that shows the football on a dodgy satellite hook-up from Turkey. It is the Britain that keeps our manicured lawn so tidy by throwing the slugs over the neighbour’s fence and the Britain that pays the babysitter in alcopops.
