Itâs a beautiful chair. A gorgeous chair. All gleaming and evocative and red leather covered and wicked looking; an object of desire, more than just a piece of furniture.
I shouldnât have bought it. Simon will go nuts when he arrives and finds Iâve had it delivered. This glorious old town house weâve bought was just a smidgen beyond our budget, even allowing for us doing it up ourselves, and on top of that weâre saving for our wedding. There just isnât really any money to splurge on luscious Victorian antiques, no matter how divine and desirable they are.
Yet when I saw the chair, I saw Simon in it, and thatâs why I went back and bought it. I could just imagine him lounging against the leather, enthroned like a sex god and ready to dispense retribution, just like one of those vintage disciplinary gentlemen in the Blue Book.
Ah, the dear old Blue Book. Suddenly, Iâm awash with memories, and Iâm back there, on holiday at that cottage by the lake, opening those pages, poring over the old Victorian spanking photographs they containedâ¦and seeing the light. Neither of us had really had a clue before then about the wicked, delicious secrets that really turn us on. Well, maybe we had, a bit, but it took the book to make our fantasies bloom into life.
The Blue Book became our instruction manual. Simonâs guide when he took me over his knee; my template of deportment as I lay there, being punished. We played, and loved, and fucked throughout that holiday, all fired up by our discoveries on those pages.
The book is closed and in a safe place right now, but somehow itâs still open in my mind, the images morphing and blending with the reality of this chair. The texture of the red leather and the sheen of polished wood. It all swirls together, priming me for the games weâve played ever since then, too, the dark rituals of pain and pleasure, lush and sweet.
Suspended somewhere between the past and the present, I walk around the chair, examining it and knowing with every step that itâs worth the extravagance.
The frame is fashioned from exquisitely turned walnut, with sexily carved legs and side panels, and the upholstery is done in red leather, a deep, smooth, silky, almost buttery red leather, aged now and a bit scuffed and discolored here and there, but still splendid and alive with magical history.
Eager to sell, the antique shop owner waxed lyrical about the chairâs provenance. His claim was that itâd once been amongst the furnishings of a notorious Victorian house of pleasure, a naughty and rather innovative Hampstead brothel, frequented by aristocratic ladies in search of the kind of imaginative rumpo they couldnât get from their stuffy husbands at home. I suspected that the entire tale was fabricated, but Simonâs eyes lit up as he listened to the spiel, no doubt imagining the intersection between the man brothel and contents of the Blue Bookâ¦and the sight of that was enough to convince me we must have the chair, whatever the cost.
âSuzanne? Are you there?â
Oops, now Iâm in for it. I didnât think heâd be here just yet. Weâve been working on our new house in every minute of our free time, and doing as much of the renovation ourselves as we can. Simon the workaholic stays much longer at the office than I do, so Iâm always here first, before he arrives, doing the odd bit of scraping and sanding. We usually have a quick evening meal together before getting really stuck in another hour or two. Iâd planned to hide the chair under one of the many dust sheets draped everywhere, and then get around to revealing it at the right moment, when heâs mellow.
But mellow or otherwise, it seems that momentâs here now.
The front door slams and I hear his firm, light stride crossing the entrance hall. Itâs too late now to conceal my crime, but I will him to hurry, hurry, hurry. I want him here, now, to catch me with the chair. I want to see the stern-sweet look in his beautiful blue eyes, and to kneel before him, acknowledging my fault, my rash spending.