Lillie Maguire kept the letter tucked into the inside zipped compartment of her handbag, a battered beige one Sam had bought her in David Jones one Christmas. The handbag was as soft as butter from years of use, and coins would slip down in the places where the lining had split, but she didnât care: it was a part of him.
She had so little left of Sam that she treasured what she did have: his pillow, which still had the faintest scent of his hair, the shirt heâd worn that last day going into hospital, the engagement ring with its tiny opal bought forty years before. And the David Jones bag with the ripped lining. These were her treasures.
The letter was almost a part of the bag now: the edges curled up, the folds worn. Sheâd read it many times since it arrived a fortnight ago and could probably recite it in her sleep. It was from Seth, the half-brother she hadnât known existed, and the one link to a mother sheâd never known.
Please come, Iâd love to meet you. Weâd love to meet you, Frankie and I. You see, Iâve been an only child for fifty and then some years, and itâs wonderful to hear that I have a sister after all. I never knew you existed, Lillie, and Iâm sorry.
Iâm sorry too to hear about your husbandâs death. You must be heartbroken. Tell me if Iâm being forward for proffering such advice, but perhaps this is exactly the right time for you to come? Being somewhere new might help?
The one thing I can say for sure after all these years on the planet is that you never know whatâs around the corner. I lost my job three months ago, and that was completely unexpected!
Weâd love to have you with us, really love it. Do come. As I said before: I may be speaking out of turn because Iâve never suffered the sort of bereavement you have, Lillie, but it might help?
It was such a warm letter. Lillie wondered if Sethâs wife, Frankie, had a hand in the writing of it because there was such a welcome contained in it, and yet the wise woman in Lillie thought that Seth was probably still reeling at discovering her very existence.
The sudden appearance of a sixty-four-year-old Australian sister could mean many things to an Irishman called Seth Green on the other side of the world, but most shocking might be the knowledge that his mother, now dead, had kept this huge secret from him all his life.
Women were often better at secrets than men, Lillie had always felt. Better at keeping them and better at understanding why people kept them.
They knew how to say âdonât mind me, my dear, Iâm fine, just a bit distractedâ to an anxious child or a confused husband when they werenât fine at all, when their minds were in a frenzy of worry. What would the doctor say about the breast lump theyâd found?Could they afford the mortgage?
Would their shy son ever make a friend in school?
No, a wise woman could easily make the decision that certain information would only bring pain to her loved ones, so why not keep all the pain to herself? She could handle it on her own, which meant they didnât need to.
Men were different. In Lillieâs experience, men liked things out in the open.
So given a bit of time, Seth might feel entirely differently about the whole notion that his mother had borne another child before him when she was very young, and had handed that child to a convent that had in turn handed her to a sister convent in Melbourne. It might just help him, if he were to meet that child.
An open-ended ticket, Lillie decided. That would be the right way to travel to see Seth and Frankie.
Martin, one of Lillieâs two grown-up sons, had set the whole thing in motion.
Soon after Samâs death, Martin, who was tall, kind and clever, just like his father, had taken up genealogy and started spending many hours on his computer looking for details of his past. As a university history lecturer, he said he couldnât believe heâd never thought to do this before.
âItâs the history of our family, I should have taken this on years ago. What was wrong with me?â he asked, running hands through shaggy dark hair that made Lillieâs fingers itch to get the scissors to it, the way she used to when he was a kid.