Title Page
Chapter 1 – The Sea Spray Theatre
Chapter 2 – Teapots and Light Bulbs
Chapter 3 – Keith Chalk
Chapter 4 – Incomprehensible
Chapter 5 – Sir Stuart Crisps’ Aquarium
Chapter 6 – Nothing Broken
Chapter 7 – Luxury Yacht
Chapter 8 – Crab Pie Island
Chapter 9 – Pier Again
Chapter 10 – Potty and the Failed Distraction
Chapter 11 – The International Magic Guys
Chapter 12 – Operation Potty
Chapter 13 – High-visibility Jet Pack
Chapter 14 – Another Flying Machine
Chapter 15 – A Bright Future
Afterword by Dr Pompkins
Copyright
About the Publisher
Boomph!
Esmé and Monty Pepper were on the beach when they heard the first explosion.
“What was that?” asked Monty, turning round.
“It came from that tiny island just out to sea,” replied Esmé, who had been looking for fossils. “I wonder what could have caused it.” Esmé wrinkled her brow and stood up facing the island, which looked like a palm tree pudding in a bowl of blue custard.
Boooomph!
There was another bang, bigger this time and closer.
“Oh, dear,” said Monty.
“It’s Potty!” said Esmé. “Come on, take your flippers off, Monty – we’d better go and check if he’s all right.”
It was springtime and the Pepper twins were spending the school break at the seaside with Potty – a professional and very tall magician with wispy, worm-like hair and one long eyebrow.
Potty had done a good job of looking after Esmé and Monty last summer. When they had arrived back from holiday, Mr and Mrs Pepper were impressed to hear how the twins had saved a local magic club and organised its new junior division. Now, Esmé and Monty’s hippie parents wanted to use the springtime school break to catch a quick glimpse of the Sacred Mountain of Terry in Goa, and sing a hymn to the Indian Goddess of Soil – or something like that. So again they entrusted Potty to look after their children at the seaside while he put on his latest Sea Spray Theatre show at the end of Crab Pie Pier.
Had Mr and Mrs Pepper been given details about last summer’s exploding toaster, flooded kitchen, spilt baked beans, damaged laptop, etc. then they might have thought twice about leaving their children with Potty again. But, luckily for Esmé and Monty, they weren’t told anything of the sort.
By the sound of explosion number two, Potty was up to his old tricks again. The twins ran towards the theatre as fast as they could.
Esmé, dressed with practicality in mind for a spring break on the British coast, was wearing a yellow mac over a sweatshirt and navy blue straight-fit trousers. Her plimsolls had plenty of grip that helped her to run across the pebbly beach without slipping. Monty, on the other hand, had dressed this morning in a Victorian blue-and-white striped bathing suit, complete with rubber ring and flippers, and his usual black velvet cape. Having been on the beach for the last two hours, Monty had picked up plenty of seaweed, which hung from his rubber ring and made him look like a cross between a sea monster and a chandelier. The curling fronds of seaweed trailed behind him as they ran up the steps to the Sea Spray Theatre.
The Sea Spray Theatre had been built on Crab Pie Pier in the 1930s. Throughout the decades it had played host to many top names: Pat Daniels, Timothy Cooper, Fay Presto. It was a great example of art deco architecture – featuring a curved facade, wooden panels around the front entrance and magnificent geometric arches along the roof. Well, it would have been a great example if the exterior had not been crumbling away – decades of salty air biting into the smooth, rendered surface, destroying the varnish on the wooden panels and bleaching the once-bright colours. The seagulls that always sat in a line along the top of the building had also added their own, rather sticky, decoration over the years.
The twins came running in through the main entrance, knocked over the spider plant by the main door and rushed into the auditorium.
“Potty, Potty!” called Monty. “Are you OK? We heard a loud noise…”
Potty stood alone on the dim, unlit stage.
He was wrapped up in a huge fishing net, struggling to get out. Underneath he wore a brand new cape, which had replaced the old tweed one because it smelt of smoked mackerel. This cape was yellow with vertical satin stripes and had the words, ‘The Potty Magician’ sewn on the back. Esmé thought that it made Potty look like a particularly happy banana.
“Oh, totality,” said Potty when he saw the Pepper twins, his huge eyebrow knotting into a frown. “I’ve blown the lights.”