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First published in Great Britain by HarperImpulse 2015
Copyright © Jill Knapp 2015
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Version 2015-09-25
“Amalia?” he muttered my name as usual, never to be said with full strength. But something was different this time. He wasn’t using the familiar judgmental tone I had become accustomed to.
“At the end of it all, it’s just you you’re left with,” he continued. “Some people say life is short, and there’s no denying that.” He glanced down at the picture on his desk for a moment, taking a deep breath in the process. “But life is also long.” He looked up from the photo, and his eyebrows popped up like two arrows on his forehead. “Too long to choose a path that will lead you nowhere. Much too long not to follow your heart.”
As he took a step closer to me, I could feel tears forming in the back of my eyes. But it didn’t matter. I was stronger now. But still not strong enough to know what to say.
“I wish I had known sooner,” he muttered in a near-whisper. “But you still have time. You have a choice.”
Didn’t I always? But when have I chosen wisely? I could feel the side of my lip pulling my face into a grimace. He didn’t seem to notice.
“Don’t choose poorly,” he shook his head. If I looked close enough, I could see the sparkle of tears beginning to form in his brown eyes.
I turned my head away and reached for the door, but it was no use. His words had already penetrated something deep inside me. Perhaps it was something I had known all along.
I could almost hear Autumn’s voice gloating in my head.
In psychology this is referred to as a “breakthrough.”
“Amalia, wait!” Hayden called out from behind me. I could hear his voice cracking with distress beneath each syllable.
Despite his unease, probably brought on by chasing me in a foot pursuit, he was handling himself pretty well. Unlike me, his breath seemed perfectly in sync. I guess that’s the difference between a well-toned, six-foot-something guy running, and a five-foot five-inch girl who hasn’t been to the gym since 2010. I took a small moment to commend myself on not being a smoker and wondered how Olivia would he holding up in the exact same situation.
Although something told me Olivia wouldn’t be running through the crowded streets of midtown to get away from Alex. Or maybe she would, she did run away during the NYU dinner and that was in the financial district. Come to think of it, I never asked her why she did that. I assumed it was because of something Alex had done, or said, to her.
That seemed like a lifetime ago.
Not really paying attention to where I was headed, I somehow managed to run, in high heels no less, right into the middle of the most heavily populated area in Manhattan. Times Square.