Birthday Boy
A hilarious rollercoaster ride of pure entertainment for 9+ readers everywhere, Birthday Boy is the new Baddiel Blockbuster: featuring David’s inimitable and award-winning combination of wish-fulfilment, heart and hilarity, all brought to life by regular collaborator Jim Field’s witty, stylish illustrations.What if it was every day?This is the story of Sam Green, who really, really, really loves birthdays. He loves the special breakfasts in bed. The presents. The themed parties. Blowing out the candles on his cake. Everything.He is so excited about his 11th birthday, in fact, that he wishes it was his birthday every day.So, at first, it’s quite exciting when his birthday happens again the next morning. And again. And again. And again…But it’s not long before things start to go wrong. Soon, disaster strikes, threatening something Sam loves even more than birthdays.Sometimes you have to be careful what you wish for…
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First published in Great Britain by
HarperCollins Children’s Books in 2017
HarperCollins Children’s Books is a division of HarperCollinsPublishers Ltd,
HarperCollins Publishers
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London SE1 9GF
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Text copyright © David Baddiel 2017
Illustrations copyright © Jim Field 2017
All rights reserved.
Cover illustration copyright © Jim Field 2017
David Baddiel and Jim Field assert the moral right to be identified as the author and illustrator of the work respectively.
A catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library
All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the non-exclusive, non-transferable right to access and read the text of this e-book on screen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, down-loaded, decompiled, reverse engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereinafter invented, without the express written permission of HarperCollins.
Source ISBN: 9780008200473
Ebook Edition © 2017 ISBN: 9780008200497
Version: 2018-09-18
To Grandpa Colin
Contents
Part 1: For he’s a jolly good fellow …
Chapter 3: The Star-Watcher Explorer
Chapter 5: When you wish upon a star
Chapter 9: This could get complicated
Chapter 12: A packet of Werther’s Originals, some shoelaces and a jar of Duraglit
Chapter 13: It always just points straight back at me
Chapter 14: Can’t make out what you’re saying there at all
Part 2: For he’s a jolly good fellow …
Chapter 18: Sir Guinea Pig and the Green Knight
Chapter 21: Especially on your birthday
Chapter 23: That island in the middle of the river
Chapter 30: Over the waves of a concrete sea
Chapter 33: The one thing you definitely need on a dangerous secret mission
Chapter 34: Altogether a strange sight
Chapter 36: How much of an idiot is he?
Chapter 37: Schropplingythingy
Chapter 40: Extremely dark and muddy
Chapter 43: Some sort of rhythm
Chapter 44: Moonlight motorcade
Chapter 46: Flick. Flick. Flick. Shine. Shine. Shine. Flick. Flick. Flick.
Chapter 47: I’m a guinea pig, for crying out loud
Chapter 48: Stronger than the north pole
Chapter 51: Very loud, and thudding
Chapter 53: Don’t swear in front of my children
Chapter 55: Wobbly and windy and swaying and frightening
Chapter 57: Ten, Nine, Eight, Seven, Six, Five, Four, Three, Two, One …
Chapter 59: Birthday Two (The real one)
Chapter 60: Case successfully closed
Chapter 61: He’s always going to be here
Chapter 62: Once a week, at night
Sam Green was really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really looking forward to his eleventh birthday.
I mean: really. He couldn’t wait. In the days leading up to it – his birthday was on the eighth of September – he simply wouldn’t talk about anything else.
“Have you sorted your school bag, Sam?” his mother, Vicky, would say in the morning.
“I’m thinking an Adventure Time cake this year, Mum,” Sam would reply. “With Finn, Jake and Ice King figures. What do you think?”
“I think you should get your school bag sorted,” she’d answer.
“Do you want to play football?” his friends would say to him at break-time.
“What about a magic party?” he would reply. “You all come, having learnt a different magic trick, right, and then we each perform it in turn – me last, of course – and then … where are you going?”
“To play football,” they’d answer. “Break’s nearly over.”
“What would you like for dinner?” his dad, Charlie, would say to him and his younger sister, Ruby, in the evening.
Ruby would open her mouth and say:
“Actually” – she said “actually” a lot – “I fancy shep—” but before she got any further Sam would be saying:
