The Person Controller
From the author of THE PARENT AGENCY comes a thrilling, funny and touching new adventure.Fred and Ellie are twins. But not identical (because that's impossible for a boy and a girl). They do like all the same things, though. Especially video games. Which they are very good at. They aren't that good, however, at much else – like, for example, football, or dealing with the school bullies.Then, they meet the Mystery Man, who sends them a video game controller, which doesn't look like any other controller they've ever seen. And it doesn't control any of their usual games. When the twins find out what it does control, though, it seems like the answer to all their problems. And the key to all their wildest dreams. At least it seems like that…
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First published in hardback in Great Britain by HarperCollins Children’s Books 2015
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Text © David Baddiel, 2015
Illustrations © Jim Field 2015
Jacket illustration © Jim Field, 2015
Jacket Design © HarperCollinsPublishers Ltd 2014
David Baddiel and Jim Field assert the moral right to be identified as the author and illustrator of the work.
A catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library
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Source ISBN: 9780007554522
Ebook Edition © 2015 ISBN: 9780007554553
Version: 2018-08-23
To the Grandmas – Sarah, and Dinks, late of this parish.
Contents
Copyright
Part 1: Pause
Chapter 1: Fred and Ellie
Chapter 2: Eric
Chapter 3: Cyberdodo
Chapter 4: The other twins
Chapter 5: Fred’s football trials: just one example
Chapter 6: Wedgie
Chapter 7: Click here
Chapter 8: Say please
Chapter 9: The package
Chapter 10: Pair with Controller
Chapter 11: Prepare yourself
Chapter 12: Wwwwoooaargggh!
Chapter 13: 7.13
Chapter 14: Wheee! and wheheyheey!
Chapter 15: Countdown
Chapter 16: Have we got any bacon?
Chapter 17: Good behaviour
Chapter 18: I’mgonnakillyouuuuuuuu!!
Chapter 19: My turn
Chapter 20: Ellie Premium Edition
Chapter 21: You’re my stylist
Part 2: Upgrade
Chapter 22: Most Improved
Chapter 23: Flashback
Chapter 24: Time to shine
Chapter 25: it’s bananas, Morris
Chapter 26: A kind of looking-down smile
Chapter 27: It’s a deal
Chapter 28: A shaven gorilla
Chapter 29: Thor’s hammer of bacon
Chapter 30: Actually, it’s not Skype
Chapter 31: No More Questions!
Chapter 32: Nerd
Chapter 33: It’s got a flashing light on it
Chapter 34: Two cowboys about to draw
Chapter 35: The Boxspital
Chapter 36: Happy Christmas, Stones …
Chapter 37: Charged to the Max
Chapter 38: Emwmwtaapt Morris
Chapter 39: I am Karabuki!
Chapter 40: Pure Power
Chapter 41: …
Chapter 42: I’ve felt better
Part 3: Highest Level
Chapter 43: A big, flat, cardboard shoe
Chapter 44: The Bracket Wood and Surrounding Area Inter-school Winter Trophy
Chapter 45: The next game
Chapter 46: There’s only really one place
Chapter 47: What happened?
Chapter 48: Never even come near me with a football again
Chapter 49: Like this one?
Chapter 50: Paired
Chapter 51: Gravity Rush
Chapter 52: When it comes to the crunch
Chapter 53: Single bow
Chapter 54: Watch Out!
Chapter 55: 110 per cent
Chapter 56: A gentle little push
Part 4: Bonus
Chapter 57: Bonus Easter egg. On Christmas Day
Footnotes
Acknowledgements
Books by David Baddiel
About the Publisher
Fred and Ellie Stone were twins. But they were never sure whether or not they could call themselves identical. They certainly shared exactly the same birthday (20th September, eleven years ago) and they had the same mum and dad (Eric and Janine). But their names were Fred and Ellie. And a boy and a girl are, clearly, not identical.>fn1
Yet they felt identical. They sometimes even felt that they knew what one another were thinking. And, even if they were 200 metres apart, they could mouth words at each other and always know what the other one was saying. They did look pretty identical too. They both wore glasses and, most of the time, their school uniforms (even though uniform wasn’t compulsory at their school). And they both, at the point at which this story begins, had braces on their top teeth.
They also both liked the same things. These included: superheroes; Japanese fantasy animation films; comics; maths (yes, they actually liked maths – sometimes they played a game called ‘Who Can Name More Decimal Places of Pi?’); and, most importantly, video games. All video games, but their favourites were FIFA, Street Fighter
